Khal-Mart Brand.

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Well played Chermside shopping mall hacker.

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Yearbook quote.

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A complaint.

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It’s always worth having a bag of googly eyes handy.

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I’m not a volcano.

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First world problems.

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The two types of knocks you hear at your door.

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Keep frozen.

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Heard my boyfriend giggling to himself in the bathroom last night, woke up to a lint roller refill.

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Boarding a plane…should I ask for a demo?

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Get a metal shift knob they said. It’ll be fun they said.

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Thanks babe.

My 78 yo neighbor can’t read or write. This is how he invoices me for mowing.

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