Funny Pictures – July 29, 2015

New debit card came today…

New debit card came today..
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My wife finally found out where I’ve been getting my frozen Snickers bars.

My wife finally found out where I've been getting my frozen Snickers bars.
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Seems legit. I’d vote for him.

Seems legit. I'd vote for him.
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I asked google a very simple question. I did not get the answer I expected.

I asked google a very simple question. I did not get the answer I expected.
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Workers with a sense of humor.

Workers with a sense of humor
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Watermelon?

Watermelon?
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My Dad had open heart surgery, so I got him this shirt.

My Dad had open heart surgery, so I got him this shirt.
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Recently got a speeding ticket. This was the only envelope I could find, so I felt obliged to dot my i’s with little hearts.

Recently got a speeding ticket. This was the only envelope I could find, so I felt obliged to dot my i's with little hearts.
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I posted these new pool rules at a local swimming pool.

I posted these new pool rules at a local swimming pool
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And then we’ll take it higher.

And then we'll take it higher
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I think my two romantically-involved housemates might be hinting at something here.

I think my two romantically-involved housemates might be hinting at something here
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Review quotes for Adam Sandler’s “Pixels”.

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Mischievous Roomba this morning…

Mischievous Roomba this morning...
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This is what happens when I go out of town for a night and she watches Titanic.

This is what happens when I go out of town for a night and she watches Titanic
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I’m a pizza delivery boy and this is how someone decided to pay for a $17.17 order.

I'm a pizza delivery boy
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My Precious.

My Precious
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New sign in our apartment complex.

New sign in our apartment complex
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Shower pole fell while I was at work. Tobey tried to “fix” it with a box of French Toast Crunch. It didn’t work.

Shower pole fell while I was at work. Tobey tried to "fix" it with a box of French Toast Crunch. It didn't work.
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Some things just end badly…

Some things just end badly..
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