Hawaiian anti-theft device.

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Trying to even out my tan on my lunch break.

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These coasters have been at my work for over two months and I just realized the joke.

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Coffee?

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Guy dressed as a tree arrested for blocking traffic.

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I think I’ll have a burger.

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So, looks like my neighbors planned a long weekend away.

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Is he making that face again?

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Gandalf the Green.

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I bet you $1000 the fish flies in Michigan are worse then any other state. Even if I’m wrong I ain’t payin.

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If you don’t have a permit you need to pack up your shit and leave my neighborhood.

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Huge drop incoming.

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AirbeeNbee

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Check hairlines.

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Favorite new thing: Scratching haunting things into bananas at the market so when people take them home hours later and the words appear, they think a ghost knows their secrets.

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May the odds ever be in your favor.

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I was reading through reviews of a coffee brand that promises a heightened caffeine buzz and found this treasure.

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Partner heat map.

by Matt Shirley