Man, this toothpaste seems really greasy and tastes like lanolin. But look at that sparkle! I wonder why I can’t feel the roof of my mouth? Mistakes were made.
Visited the modern art museum today. Fascinating stuff!
Shots fired by the local Barber shop.
My wife left me in charge of the shower curtain.
Hope there’s no full moon tonight.
My 10 year old drew this, it gave me a good laugh.
When I cancel my gym membership.
I’m single and I picked out my own shower curtain.
“And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him.”
I don’t always receive packages from my farther, but when I do..
“Hang up the TV” – On it boss!
It’s almost that time of year ladies!
Walmart has a monopoly on Mr.Monopoly.
Probably could’ve thought of a more appetizing name for chocolate covered gummy bears.
I’m not single and I got to pick one thing to decorate the apartment.
Amazon pull-up bar review.
When your dog gets out of prison.
Say goodbye to toilet paper!
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