This wet floor sign at the Toronto aquarium.

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At the airport waiting to embarrass Jimmy.

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My daughter’s Christmas list I just read. I almost choked on my burger.

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Who hurt you NYC Sanitation copy writer?

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Mom: I don’t want a cat in my house! Also mom:

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In Britain, we sell brushes for everything.

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Best ex ever!

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I shall free my people.

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Finished my wrapping.

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We embarrassed my mom at the airport with this sign.

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My friend made me a cake after my divorce.

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Step 1: Cut a hole in the box.

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“Bout Tree Fiddy”

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Smart-ass cousin’s reaction to my 6850 light Christmas tree.

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Found this

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Cornwall has a place to ass.

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We’re taking the scenic route.

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What were his parents thinking?

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I always feel strange grabbing this door handle.

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Neighbor’s dog

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