Neighbor stole my parking spot yesterday. Woke up to this. The Bird Gods have my back.

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Chili sauce names in Australia.

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Judging the neighbors.

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This parental gate on my app.

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You can’t say I am wrong.

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Training didn’t go as planned.

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Deception master.

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Love it.

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Words to live by.

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No background check needed.

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The event of the year!

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Are you feeling lucky, punk?

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Just enjoying the vacation.

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My girlfriend got an X-ray today and forgot to tell the doctor she had her nipples pierced.

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UNITE!

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My sister’s dog sleeps like this.

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